Remember Red Rover, the game we played on the school playground? During this game, the captain of each team chose the players until every person was on a team. I can remember my heart beating fast during the “choosing” portion of the game because I did not want to be chosen last. Honestly, in life, I still don’t want to be chosen last. Being chosen tells us that we are valued, wanted, preferred, selected, favored, singled out. The opposite of chosen is declined, turned down, refused, rejected, unwanted; painful words at best. Friendship is two people who say “I choose you and you choose me”. My friendships are one of the most sacred treasures in my life, and those things we treasure we protect. We put them in a safe place so that they can’t be damaged or broken.
As women, we thrive on strong relationships with our girlfriends. We can share our problems, feelings, victories, failures, and vulnerabilities with our girlfriends. We can’t share all of these with anyone else, even the most loving spouse. (remember “Men are from Mars/Women are from Venus”?) There are just some things only another female understands. These types of friendships can take years to cultivate but sometimes they just happen authentically through an instant bond. I want to be the friend that my girls
call on when they need a shoulder to cry on, a secret kept, a prayer prayed, or just a good kick in the pants and a dose of honesty. I also want to be the girl they call when the bottom falls out and they need a safe place to land, that place where no words can mend, only my presence is needed in the moment.
Women by nature are intuitive. I’ve called on friends many times and the first thing they said to me was “what’s wrong Jen”. It is SUCH A BLESSING, to have girlfriends who know you so well that they can tell by the sound of your voice that something is off and then they take the time to walk through whatever that something is with you. If we are lucky, we have one friend like that, if we are really- really lucky, we have many friendships like that.
Ladies, no matter your age, treasure your girlfriends. Teach (by your actions) your daughters and granddaughters the importance of friendship. Teach them to take the time to nurture their female relationships. Girlfriends are one of the greatest gifts God has given us.
Oil and perfume make the heart glad, and the sweetness of a friend comes from his earnest counsel Prov. 27:9
